Icon of Coil US tour 2012: Day 20 and 21

The Texans has got it all figured out...

Historic trading post - now a lousy tourist trap

Buying fireworks in New Mexico

El Paso

El fucking Paso, yeah!

The venue in El Paso was a bar, but a really cool place. Too bad there was only about 25 people there. It was a weird experience, but it is all about the people who show up, not the ones that don't. To all of you who came out to the show in El Paso, thank you for keeping it real and for supporting us and your local promoter. It is you who are making us go on. Without you we are nothing

Hanging out before show @ House of Rock

House of Rock

While loading the van we hauled out some toys, aka fire crackers. Some thought it wasn't a good idea to shoot fire crackers in El Paso, byt we figured people around there probably knew the difference between the sound of a fire cracker and a gun better than anyone else. So the first one went off on the parking lot, e second one in the middle of our gear, the third one lit in Ape's belt buckle, but the wuss threw it away leaving Andy with a burn on his finger.

On our way out of El Paso, and after just a couple of yards the cops were tailing us. No, wait! The noise was actually coming from our van!! Shit! Had to stop at a gas station to check the engine. When we stopped, a hoop-t blasting Snoop Dogg drove up beside us and the Mexican driving the car were asking where we were heading. Austin, we said, and he said Fuck Austin! This is El Paso, man! And then he made a farting sound and drove off!!?? What the hell was that? Loser!!

Thanks, but no thanks!

Don't mess with my Texas waffel!

Anyway, we were stuck in El Paso. Say this out loud to yourself: S-T-U-C-K in El Paso! Yeah, gives you the shivers, right? Beats your worst nightmare! So we headed to the closest motel, checked in and waited for the AAA to arrive. The plan was to go directly to Austin, but this meant some serious change of plans. AAA only had towing service and jump starters at night though, and the van rental company didn't open till 7 am, and we would really need to go at 6 am to get into Austin in time for load-in. we went to sleep and got up at 6 am hoping everything was fixed, but nothing had happened since all companies were still closed. i surely thought USA had it all. If you need salted chocolate covered caramel popcorn with cheese and ham flavour, you'll find it I'm sure. If you have engine problems at night, which is totally normal, you are basically fucked.

And the marshmallow adventure begins

We ended up getting a white Ford 15 seater van, aka Marshmallow, so we were forced to just bring what was necessary since the van lacked cargo space, hence we brought the merch, our instruments and our laundry - the Germans of course had to stay in El Paso. But much to our surprise the border patrol (can you believe that? We needed to go through a border patrol checking point in the middle of nowhere without ever leaving the USA) found them hidden under our cargo, and as long as they stayed there we could fit them in the van.

Border patrol

We were now facing 10 hours in a not so comfortable van through godforsaken Texas territory!!! There is so much land in this state! What a waste! You guys defeated the Mexicans - for what? Sand, dust, rocks and gravel? And you aren't even using it!! There is some mystery to a lot of this wasteland, though. One sign said "Dusty storms may exist". Wooooo! So may ghosts... and god ... and a parallell worlds... and groupies without std's.

Austin

Jesus loves me

...the ride to Austin was exhAustin :-p And to make it to the show, we had to make fewer and shorter stops than usual. Even then we arrived just half an hour before doors. In addition we were discussing and making phone calls to figure out a) how to get from Austin to Chicago since our replacement rental was to be returned in Austin, b) how to avoid paying for it and have Bandago paying for it since it was their fucking van that broke down and got us into all this trouble, c) how to get Tyler and our luggage and equipment, that we had to leave behind due to lack of space, out of El Paso and to wherever we were and d) find out whether we needed to rent a cargo van from El Paso or if our Mercedes would be repaired in time for Tyler to take that to Austin, Chicago or Indianapolis. And I bet we discussed some other issues too. In the end Bandago promised they would fix us a rental and have it delivered to our hotel, so then we just wait for the new rental to arrive, load it then drive to the aiport to drop off the other rental. Man, this was getting both stressful and expensive. Although we were in the middle of rural Texas and some dude with a cowboy hat at a gas station in Harper, TX told us to stay away from Stonewall "cause that was where all the cops were hanging out waiting to pull over a group of people like us", we had to just open that one bottle of Shiner Bock and chug it.

No time for truck stops

I mean, Texas is one of those states where you might be pulled over in some small shitty town for driving a red car on a Thursday. Still, Texans are such great people, especially in the cities. I've always felt so welcome in Texas - you guys are so friendly. Well, I reckon they are great out in the country too, as long as they aren't all prejudist and hunt you down and hate fuck you, pass you on to their cousins before they flay you and wear your skin when going a second necrophilic round on your bloody ass. Just saying...

...in fucking Texas!

Nevertheless, we made it to Austin, which was our main concern (as always), and we set up the stage, met the VIPs and did soundcheck all at the same time. Good thing the VIPs were cool; we were joking and talking and forgot about all the stress for a moment. We did all these things in the shortest time ever and I swore I'd become drunk quickly that night, which unfortunately did happen. Had a blast on stage and had fun hanging out after the show, both in the venue and at the bar across the street, but wish I wasn't drunk and exhausted so I could enjoy conversations even more. Well, shit happens...on this tour!

Left to right: Some guy, babysitter 1, babysitter 2

I was going to a bar across the street after the show with a couple of guys that were up to some good, and that was definitely fun. Actually, I remembered the next day that I briefly met the girl all the way back in 2001 in San Antonio. If you read this - see, I remember now :-P Luckily they were also acting as babysitters this night in Austin (thanx), so they got me back to my hotel. Good thing they were responsible, cause I HAD written down the address to the hotel, which was Wyndham Garden Hotel, BUT in my notes it said "Winfom gardeb ote". I'm not sure that would have gotten me back to my hotel :-O Have no idea what time I got back to the hotel in Austin, but I remember Ape's horrified look when I by mistake jumped into his bed instead of mine. He looked like he knew he was getting raped. Priceless!

"Keep your words sweet, you might have to eat them" (sign outside a church in Harper, TX)